Milestones

Milestone #1 - Residence Visa - Many of you know that we have been living in limbo about our residence status here. We've been here for almost 6 months and assumed we would have passed this milestone several months back. This milestone is the key to getting a bank account, a post office address, being able to buy and register a car in our name and, of course, travel across the border in our small town. This milestone is not totally passed - I'm deciding to call it a Mile - Zone as opposed to a Milestone because it isn't passing quickly (= We have a job, we've signed the contract (that took 6 days) now we need to wait for visa paperwork to be completed. Hence the zone concept.

Milestone #2 - Layla starts pre-school and loves it.
Yes indeed. She has gone three days this week and is doing well. In her words:
"I cried a little bit, but it was okay."
" I had some trouble today. I was grabbing. But it will be okay."
" We need to put the juice box in this pocket on my bag. It leaks in the other pocket." (she's majorly attached to her little rolling bag she takes to school!)
"I said (arabic word arabic word arabic word) and (somethign like an arabic word?) today in school!"

Milestone #3 - We are not going to look for another house to move into.
We had been casually looking for a slightly larger house. We could really do with one more room to use as a guest room/other things, but we just aren't finding anything that we like as much as our place. One GREAT thing about our house is that no one could build another house near us that is two stories tall. If that happend, I'd have to wear different clothes in our yard and one of the things I love about our yard is that no one can see in and I can wear whatever I want. Also, because we've been in our house for 4 years, the rent is super low compared to market value these days. We've never met our landlord, but from what we can tell from our agent, he is very happy to have us stay in the house and doesn't want us to move. Consequently, we've been given permission to make some changes/improvements to the house.

Milestone #4 - Ryan sleeps through the night. Oh wait. That isn't happening yet.


In the picture above, Layla is a week from turning three years old, Ryan is almost 4 months (yes, he is a big kid) and I am 37 and Tom is 42 (= We are definitely feeling our age these days! Thanks to all of you who make it possible for us to be here in so many ways.

Random

This week has been noticeably cooler! We can't believe how fast it changed. The afternoons are still unpleasant, but the mornings and evenings are actually pretty nice. Still sweaty if you move, but if you are sitting still with some cool water, and if you aren't stressed or worried about anything, you may not even break a sweat. I've yet to get to that place, but we're happy that "Fall" is around the corner!

Layla started nursery school again today! It went much better than last time. This is likely due to the fact that she knows 4 of the 11 kids in her class. Their parents are all at the language school - see Birthday party photos and you'll see all the older kids who are with her. This is a big advantage over our last attempt, plus Layla is 5 months older and she has been settled here for much longer. we are hoping to have her in four days a week. One of those days will be without the foreign kids - we hope she will get more comfortable in a more Arab environment. It is likely that in January we will consider moving her to another good nursery school reccommend to us that does not have any foreign kids. It REALLY hampers learning language if there is even one other english speaking kid in class!

Visa attempts #2 and #4 are back in play. #2 was the situation where Tom was flat out told he wouldn't get a visa because of the wording on his diploma. We got a call two days ago that his paperwork was ready to be picked up today! hmmmm. Attempt #4 is a totally new situation that is our preference and a verbal offer has almost been made - enough that he was told the offer would come by email by today or tomorrow. We'll see about that.

So it feels like schedules are all mixed up and not ready to be settled for a week or two. Hopefully Tom will have a new work schedule and Lj has her nursery school and I am ready for my times out to the ladies gym and Ryan....well Ryan still needs to figure out how to sleep for 7 hours. Sigh. He was 80% there before our trip to Dtown, but we are back to waking up at about 4am or 5am every night. he isn't hungry, just awake and progressively crankier. I would like to chalk it all up to his runny nose (he sounds SO sad and pathetic!) but that might be wishful thinking. He's a completely easy baby in every other way so we are rather mystified by this one issue. However, we are grateful for just ONE issue at the moment with him!

I have been helping a new language school family get to know their neighbors...they need some to go with them to say hello and do general chatting. It has been fun to be out speaking Arabic again - I feel like it has been ages since I've visited. Oh wait. It HAS been ages. (=

Our visit yesterday was a total surprise. After the lady opened the door, I told my friend Debbie that this would be a short visit. It was a rather elderly lady and her generation speaks a version of Arabic I totally do not understand. The yard and house were dirty and not cleaned up. It wasn't filthy or anything, just old rugs laying around outside on the gravel (rugs keep the dust down) with trash and stuff all over. The mejulis (sitting room) had only two back cushions and a patchwork of carpets covering the floor. I got the impression they just bought a new carpet when the other got too dirty! I sat down on something hard and realized it was an ashtray. When is the last time you saw an honest-to-goodness ashtray! Or sat on one?

The dear woman had two teeth - one on the bottom right and one on the top left and both of them stuck out beyond her lips (= She was clearly surprised by the visit. Everything she brought out was dirty and it was definitely one of those times you just eat, drink and pray. Like I mentioned, I was shocked by how well I understood her and she told us that she was from the "dach a leah" which means the Interior. Her family were likely semi-nomadic bedouins that herd goats/camels and farm dates at certain points in the year. Her husband died 17 years ago in a car accident and she had just moved to this house last year. I was surprised by that - older folks don't tend to move. I think the house was such a bit because only her sons lived there (= Sorry to all you bachelor-types..... You'd likely think her family was poor, but I'm sure they aren't - one is an electrician, two are in the policeforce and one in the Army. They are well-cared for by the government, I assure you. They just live in that social/economic class of rural folks who have just moved to the city. They display their wealth in the cars, clothes and watches, not in their homes. They didn't even have air conditioners in all the rooms! It may mean all the guys sleep in the mejulis (likely) or that some of them are so fresh off the desert that the air conditioners are unpleasant. Who knows.

Anyway - that was my morning yesterday (= Hopefully I'l have a post here very soon about Tom's visa option being decided!! Please God?

Henna!

I've been meaning to post these pictures for awhile.....I may not have unpacked our suitcases from Dtown yet, but I'm getting caught up on posting pictures (= Ahhh, priorities! Jessy wanted to get Henna done before she left and we took Layla along for her first Henna experience! She did SOOOOO well sitting in the chair and not moving! I was shocked at how careful she was and how still she sat afterwards to let it dry. So cute (= These were taken in July before I chopped off her hair (= She was getting so hot and sweaty all the time and she was refusing to wear any hair things so I just cut it all off one day!

Birthday Party #2

The day after we returned from D town, we had our Princess and Pool party. These are only photos of the Princess part....I didn't take any pictures of the pool part. Just imagine all those kids running around outside with underwear, swimsuits or birthday suits and you get the picture! We are very grateful for our hosh (yard) that is large enough for lots of kids to play in! Yeah to Tom for taking care of the pool (= We are actually considering buying a bigger one with a frame and putting it on our roof!! They are much cheaper than we expected when we looked at the store (the guest house we were staying in has a framed-pool). Who knows....just an idea at this point. All in all, it was a TOTALLY chaotic 2 hours and I hope it was worth all the work before hand and attitude issues afterwards (=

Birthday Party #1

Tom's Dad came through town for a few nights last week so we all stayed in a guest house up near the airport. With the border issues, there was no point in coming all the way back to our house. We celebrated Layla's birthday one evening after dinner since it was only a few days after Jon left.

Happy Birthday Layla!!

It is so hard to believe that three years have passed since my crazy birth experience with Layla. She has changed so much and been such a delight to us in so many ways. How fun to be her mama (=

We had a party here this afternoon with way too many kids (= It was crazy fun and I'll post pictures soon.

Birthday Preparations!

I am making a real attempt at planning a birthday for Layla this year. Her first birthday was on the heels of packing up our house here and arriving in the US. I actually PURCHASED a cake from the grocery store and decorated it with tubes of icing. A major no-no in my opinion. I love decorating cakes - and doing fun shapes was something my mom always did. Her second birthday was a little better. We did a school bus cake in honor of the most irritating song in the world. I dare not type the title of it as it will be in everyone's brain the rest of the day. There were no invites or other sweet little girls at that party. Just family -- which is wonderful, mind you!

This year, it will be a BUNCH of kids for a "Princess and Pool" party! I managed to think up a fun invite and I have the cakes already made and in the freezer ready to be cut and decorated. I'm doing this almost a week in advance because we leave tomorrow for 5 days in D-town. We are excited to see Layla's Granddaddy and to have some time in a "slightly" more modern city (=

You can't read this, but basically it says that YOU are invited to the Carlson Villa for a Princess and Pool party on September 19th. 430pm - 630pm. Hopefully it won't be too uncomfortably hot at that time of day. Who am I kidding. It'll be hot.

German goodness

I used to live with Terri who was somehow connected with Germany. I can't remember Terri...did you live there? Remind me. Anyway, she introduced me to potatoe latkes and to some other thing I can't remember the name of but it was like fondue. (why am I posting about things I can't remember??).
Point being, I've been waiting to make potatoe latkes for years. Really. I just never found the right moment. So during the last few days of Ramadan here, I've been wanting to take some food over to our neighbors for their Iftar dinner. That is the semi-light meal they eat to break the fast. For some reason the food is usually fried. I've been trying to find some good finger food that would be easy to make in large quantities and that would hopefully be to their liking.
Thanks to Jon and Lisa who gave me the spectacular kitchen aid attachment last year, I was able to grate all the potatoes in record time! I had a little trouble fitting it into the mixer so I called Vic who has the same one (hence the idea!). She helped me out but when I was trying to detach the thing at the end I was having a bit of trouble. Layla was watching me poke around with out any success and she said "why don't you call Aunt Vic again?" Ha.
I think they were a hit judging from my neighbor across the street who texted me saying "thanks habeebti! mmmmmmmm yuumy". Habeebti is a term of endearment here.
I'm making more tonight for another set of neighbors. My house, clothes and hair all smell like fried potatoes. ugh.

Birthday Thoughts

Turning 37 today! I can remember when I was 20 years old and thinking about how I would be, how life would be, in the year 2000 when I would be 27 and then in the year 2010 when I was going to be 37. Life in real color is pretty different from what I was imagining!

I am far less sure of myself, feel far less capable about life in general and feel far more aware of my shortcomings. I imagine most of this is (mericifully) just growing up.

I spent some time thinking about Matt 6:32 + 33 this morning.

“For all these things the Gentiles eagerly seek; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things shall be added to you.”

The anxiousness mentioned is about people wanting to ensure that they have life the way they need it. I’ve never connected much with this passage because I always thought that the things mentioned in the passage were pretty mundane and not something I really struggle with. I don’t worry about where my food is coming from or where my clothes are coming from: A. I’ve had enough money for both in my life and B. I know without a doubt that all money comes from God.

For some reason this morning God prompted me to think about what do I think I need to have in my life or what would I like to have in my life. What do I “eagerly seek”?

Being the person I want to be

Alone time

People treating me the way I should be treated

Family, friends and spouse who are as attentive and understanding as they should be

Getting the respect and recognition I deserve

Being the mother I want to be

Being the mother I need to be

Now I believe that some of those things are fine to pursue – we need them – they are positive. Just like in the passage that mentions food and clothing. The point isn’t that the food and clothing are bad things, it is the practice of putting them at the bull’s eye of your life energy that is the problem.

God is saying to put His Kingdom and His Righteousness at the center of the bull’s eye instead. So again I asked myself, what do I think those things mean in my life? I hate to say that the concept of “His Righteousness” is a fuzzy concept to me. I mean really. What does that actually look like? I can think of lots of religious vocabulary to put in here, but I’m pretty sure those are inaccurate concepts.

When I give it some thought, here is what I think the Kingdom means in the time and space I am living in now:

Treating other people like I want to be treated is the bedrock of the Kingdom. This means trying to understand other people and meet their needs like I want to be pursued and have my needs met. This is a revolutionary idea in marriage, mind you! Really trying to value the emotional needs of others they way I value my own needs is pretty tough. I’m far more interested in my own stuff than in someoneelses’.

Bringing peace to a situation not anxiety or an immediate plan for action. Again, I’ve had a hard time connecting with this in the past because I am not an overly anxious person, but if I substitute the generic concept of anxiety with what I often do in the face of trouble, it gets more interesting! God’s Kingdom is not about finding the most efficient and effective way to solve problems. Looking at my life, you’d think that it was my mantra: “…..wait, is there a problem nearby? Here are 5 ways to solve it ranked by efficiency.” Bringing peace to a situation feels pretty different than that. Just ask Tom, I’m sure he could articulate this well given that he’s woken up next to this approach every day for 8 years(=

His Righteousness looks like this to me now:

Knowing deep deep down that it isn’t about what I do that makes things right in the world. Whether things are going well or are a struggle at the moment, there is absolutely no connection between my being acceptable enough and my life circumstances. Now there may be a connection between dumb choices and my life circumstances….but that is another thing entirely.

Also, because the Lord does not accept me based on my behavior, intelligence or capacity, I had darn well not turn around and do the opposite thing to others. I had better be trying to value people simply because the Lord says that each person is valuable. Obviously, it is easier to accept God’s mercy on our own foibles than on someone else’s foibles. The flip side is not idolizing someone who seems to have it more together in some area than I do. I didn’t see many of those folks around when I was 22, but at 37 I they seem to be everywhere! (=

Anyway. These are just some birthday thoughts early in the morning between both kids waking up and then going back to sleep.

Ramadaan Food!